My Dad for President in 2004
Platform: "Let's Take a Nap."

Forget Bush.

Forget Gore.

The man to vote for in 2004 is Rick Taft (R-Ill.), whose controversial "Let's take a nap" platform has earned surprising bi-partisan support from House Minority Whip Dick Gephart (D-Missouri).

"It's been a long day," Taft said at a press conference announcing his candidacy. "Let's take a nap."

"Although I cannot endorse Mr. Taft's run at the presidency at this time, I look forward to working closely with him in trying to get nap legislature passed in the near future," Gephart said later in a statement. "This is a great opportunity for Democrats and Republicans to come together on an issue that both Rick and I feel strongly about."

Other Capitol Hill lawmakers are not so confident.

"I am skeptical about this nap idea," said Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.). "I will have to review the proposal before I take a stance on it."

"I think that this nap-taking idea is going to create a lot more government than Mr. Taft realizes," said Senator Trent Lott (R-Mississippi) in a telephone interview Thursday. "I appreciate Mr. Taft's desire to bring napping back to the white house, in the tradition of great American presidents like William Howard Taft, Andrew Jackson, and of course, Ronald Reagan. . . I cannot endorse [Taft's platform] until I learn more details."

Taft declined to take stances on other hot issues in Washington right now such as campaign finance reform, abortion, and tax cuts. Like fellow Republican John McCain, Taft has a passion for one main issue.

"That drive from Albuquerque wore me out," said Taft at his press conference. "I'm ready for a snooze."

19 April 2001